i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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