Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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