Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
