Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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