I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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