Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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