Are we in a gay sports bar?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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