shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize