Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize