if you like me you must not know who I am
I think I am morally bankrupt
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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