Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
