absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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