How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize