Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
