I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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