It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
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