If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm getting married
To pizza
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize