haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
