Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
