Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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