You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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