So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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