So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Randomize
