Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
You need Xanax blowdarts
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
