I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever