Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum