Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
