How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
God I need to hump something, right now.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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