if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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