the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
