ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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