I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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