If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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