I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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