If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
