Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
