His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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