i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
