the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize