Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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