Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
