Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
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Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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