We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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