I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize