i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
