I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
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