maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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