I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
