I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
