Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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