no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
