I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I think your dad took our porno
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Randomize
